~A world without care~

Ok, I don't like writing a lot but when it comes to writing out my feelings is endless. Always having doubt about myself, never care about myself but others. maybe is the way I am. blogging seem boring for me because I don't know what to read. I can jump from topic to topic. Anyway, lets start from the year 2oo8.

2oo8 should be my best year. Last year of school, prom, graduation, summer fun, college, and enjoying the Olympics etc. But if I really think about it, is the worst year so far in my life. Not really want to complain but hella shit happen and it just made it bad for me. i really don't want to get into detail because is going to be a long ass blog. but i will name some. First was my best friend. not going name any names. i knew this fool for over 10 years. there are times i be mad at him but i get over it cus we friends. but this year was really out of pocket. For the first time in my life i hated him. I really thought we were very close. but i guess it wasn't as close with his other friends. ever since he got a car, i kinda see him as a different person. feel like i cant talk to him the same. he would put others before me. there was a time where he would drive all the way to someone house then dropping me down somewhere nearby. might sound normal to others but if you were at the car you would know how i felt at the time. this start to build up between us. month later another thing happen. this to me hit me the hardest. to really describe how i feel was being stab and crash by your very own close friend. even though it was not his fault that his parent don't like me, but the way he said it to me was harsh and painful. the word that came out his mouth was like a bus running over me going 100mph. well not that extreme but you get the picture. the moment he said those words i was so angry and wanted to punch him. but i didn't. i walked away. what made me more mad was after he said what he said, he walk back to his friends like nothing happen. i was so mad i walk to my car. it might make me sound like a pussy but i don't care, i end up in my car, just sitting there thinking about what he said, i start to cry. it really hurt me inside. i don't know why i would cry about this bullshit but i did. crying other friendship...*sigh*

well now i got that out the way i can talk about other stupid random things.

who really read this anyway o.0

i'll write more later...ending right here for now hope some people don't read this stupid thing i wrote, is just a way to write out my thoughts and feelings. great bloging